Where does this road lead?

I've neglected this blog for quite awhile now. I'm wanting to come back to it though. Hopefully writing on here will prove cathartic. The separation was far more traumatizing than I could have ever imagined. However, it's also been the best thing to have ever happened to me. I'm slowly figuring out who I am. I no longer care about peoples approval, at least not to the point where I'm far too cautious anymore. I put a pink streak in my hair as a way to stand behind my step mom with her breast cancer. Before this, though, I never would have done it for fear that people would think less of me. Why do I care?? I know why I'm doing it and if they want to know, they'll ask! :) That's how I'm looking at things now. He left me and I thought it was the end of the world. I'd just lost 50 lbs in 2.5 months, then I gained 30 of it back in the first month of separation. I was a pit of despair! No more! I've lost that 30 lbs finally and am feeling amazing! I'm sore, but amazing. :) I work for FedEx unloading containers of freight, by hand. Sometimes the freight is light, other times it's up to 150lbs. It's a killer workout! I also run (on an elliptical) and have shaved 9 minutes off my 3 mile time. My goal is to get up to 10 miles in the next 3 months. Then, work on shaving that time down. I run on the elliptical because it's easiest on my knees, so I'm trying to work my way up to actual running, but only once I get my stamina up. I want to run a half marathon in a year.

During the day, I work in an office as an assistant to the ladies who run the office for the owner of 7 Jason's Delis. I used to be a supervisor in his Abilene store, but when I left he wanted me to stay with the company. They want to move me to Wichita Falls for their new store. The only catch is, I'm not exactly sure how they want to use me in the store. If it's a managerial position where I'll get salary pay, I'm totally down with that. If it's as an hourly employee/supervisory role, I can't. I want so badly to help them open this restaurant, I love this company and feel it an honor to be asked. However, if it's only hourly, I know I wouldn't be able to live on my own.

I've started dating. It's kind of scary but really nice at the same time. I've been on several dates with several people and have actually met some really amazing men.

I've written a lot so far, so I think I'll call it a night. I have work at 2240 tonight, I'll be done around 0257 probably, as per my usual, then it's off to run my 3 miles, maybe more if I'm feeling up to it. Have a great night!

EJT

"How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being??" -- Oscar Wilde